private and silliy

Now I know nobody is going to read this so I can write whatever I want and not worry about being judged or thought foolish, or vain, or undisciplined, or well whatever ever else I might be afraid of by posting ideas. I was talking with a few scientists today at VCU's Center for Environmental Studies. One told me about the original Picasso  (and Miro) he has at home, as if I were an artist. Then I have to scan back and look at my background and think "okay, maybe I am an aritist" or maybe it's okay to think I am. Maybe it's only designers who try to draw the line. Maybe I don't need to. I can swing either way. Maybe even that's part of the designer in me: reserving judgment and listening and interpreting.

Another conversation with a friend who I'd like to interview about her views of Science. She said something about not knowing anything, when in fact I've hear her talk about science and it's beautiful. I told her I feel the same way talking about my idea for a labyrinth (even though another scientist I'd just spoken with was really jazzed at the idea). I asked her why we get this way when we talk about our ideas and she had a perfect answer: something about it being private. I'm not sure exactly how she put it, but it is the risk I'm slowly thinking of. Risks in my personal relationships. Risks in my work.  

I'm trying to move on from the two documentary shorts, to work that is more personal. But there are a few pieces of admin to attend to… and a 6 mile run as I taper for the New York Marathon, as if that has anything to do with anything.

What does a marathon have to do with that? It is a fabulous, concrete, real way to push through mental and physical obstacles. Maybe this in obvious to you, but it isn't to me. But I know what it feels like from training runs when I'm tired and not sure if I've got "the stuff" and I push beyond the doubts and surprise myself with some pretty swift splits and a kick in my stride.

That may be the last thing I need to add to the film "two feet off the ground".